Harry Potter and the Cracked Reservoir
Chapter 24: George ’s Prank
By Musings of Apathy
Chapter 24: George’s Prank
Thank you to my Beta’s Donalddeutsch, Cateagle and Sparky40sw.
"Hmmgm."
Harry was awakening again and felt the bundle in his arms stirring as well. He wondered what was disturbing his perfect sleep. He had not been this happy in his recollection of his life to date.
"Hmmgm."
Harry heard it this time, and evidently so had his companion. She stirred more fully this time, lifting her head.
"Hmmgm."
Harry finally recognized it as someone clearing his or her throat.
Harry opened his eyes, momentarily blinded by the bright lights of the infirmary.
"Huh?" Harry wordlessly questioned.
"Good morning, Mr. Potter," a voice that Harry immediately recognized as his Head of House said.
Harry turned his gaze to the small group of persons not horizontal in the infirmary at the time.
"Hello, Professor McGonagall, Mr. and Mrs. Weasley, Weasley family, friends. Good morning," Harry greeted.
Okay, maybe the group was not all that small.
"Good morning," she said, turning her gaze slightly to the left, "And good morning Miss Weasley."
"Huh? Wha?" Ginny said in the haze still hanging in her brain.
"I said, Good morning, Miss Weasley and as you are the only Miss Weasley in many generations, I expect that you know whom I mean," answered the Professor with a steely glint in her eye.
Apparently the sassy redhead had wakened enough to be snarkey at the least.
"Well, occasionally I do wonder about Gred and Forge," she answered.
"Hey, that was only one badly charmed group of sherbets and that was more than a year ago," sniped one of the twins in good humor.
"Yeah, and we ate the last of those last month."
The ever-strict head of the Gryffindor house was having problems maintaining her strict exterior at the exchange.
"What?" Ginny exclaimed, "I thought that you two would thrown those out after mom forbid you from using them on others."
"Others, yes," answered George, "but that doesn’t keep Fred safe when I hear his Angelina complaining about he doesn’t understand women at all. I had to do something to rectify the situation."
"Bet Angelina found that off-putting," snickered Harry.
"Yeah, can’t understand that myself," said Fred, "I think I made for a fetchingly tall woman."
"I guess she doesn’t go for such a thing," chuckled Harry, his arms still around Ginny’s waist.
"Yeah, just lucky for you that Mom forbid us from spreading the wealth. Guess we’ll have to come up with another method of prank."
"But of course, Gred."
"Quite enjoyable, Forge."
Professor McGonagall seemed to have recovered both her inner and outer calm, putting on a stern face.
"Now, Miss Weasley," Professor McGonagall addressed. "Shouldn’t you be in your own bed, not in that of someone of the opposite gender?"
Ginny shot to her feet beside the expanded bed while speaking quickly to cover her act.
"Oh, well, Professor, you see," she fumbled, "I was so worried about Harry, and I just stayed here waiting for him to wake and I thought that he would have died from the fall and I got so tired. I was just so exhausted and I was crying so Harry expanded the bed and changed me into these silk pajamas…"
"Hey, Whoa," yelled the twins in stereo, "He changed you into your pajamas!" they exclaimed with a dangerous glare at Harry.
"Hey, Guys," said Harry, quickly, sensing a threat to his person, "Magic," he said holding his wand. "Just magic, no hanky and certainly no panky."
"Oh, well, Okay then."
"Quite a good job of transfiguration, Mister Potter," admired Professor McGonagall.
"Thank you."
"Yes, quite nice pajamas you have there Miss Weasley," the Professor continued, "but that doesn’t warrant your indiscretions."
"Oh, But…But we didn’t…we haven’t…" Ginny sputtered.
"I am truly convinced of that, Miss Weasley," McGonagall stated, "and that is why I just request that you remove yourself to your own quarters and try to not repeat this event."
"Of course, Professor McGonagall," she said, moving toward the exit after a peck on Harry’s cheek. She had a sly smile on her face, indicating that she might not be serious about trying not to repeat the event. She hadn’t lied. She had no intention of letting Harry get injured again, causing him to be in the infirmary, but that didn’t mean that she couldn’t cuddle him all night at other times.
"Miss Weasley," added the stern Professor, "Your attire?"
Ginny looked down at her emerald green silk pajama bottoms and tops in dismay.
"But I like them," whined Ginny, "And Harry made them just for me."
Harry blushed and Professor McGonagall rolled her eyes at her student.
"Fine," she said. She quickly transfigured an empty potions vial to a Gryffindor robe for Ginny. "Put this on and I believe that Harry will allow you to keep your present."
Harry blushed again as Ginny smiled and let out a slight happy squeal.
At George’s insistence, he and Fred sought Professor McGonagall out later that morning, after they had checked their old haunts and had a special talk with a certain poltergeist. Leaving the surreal meeting with Peeves smiling sinisterly and their own pockets somewhat lighter, the twins found the Professor’s door open. They paused at the intimidating professor’s classroom doorway.
"Professor?"
"Hello, Misters Weasley," Professor McGonagall answered upon looking up. "How may I be of assistance?"
"George wanted to ask you something about Harry before we left; now that we see that he has recovered," Fred said, closing the door securely.
"Alright Mr. Weasley," their former teacher responded. "How may I help?"
"I was wondering," George said, "who has responsibility as Harry’s parental replacement, now?"
George and Fred were acting very serious, which concerned the Professor greatly.
"Well, Mr. Weasley," she answered, "according to the Wizengamot, Mister Potter is now an adult, and as such he no longer has anyone responsible for parenting him."
"Oh, well," George said, "we figured that, but hoped that there was still an adult that would help Harry with the things that still need to be taught, which are not covered in class."
"Such as what, Mr. Weasley?" she asked.
"Such as the facts of life, Professor," said George, blushing heavily.
"I believe," Fred immediately offered, "that what my dear brother is referring to so shyly is the facts of life in concern to the interaction of adult wizards and witches."
"Well, Mr. Weasley," she responded, "he does have relatives and that is something that they would have assuredly addressed."
"But, surely, you didn’t forget that his relatives are content with never communicating," George reminded her. "They wouldn’t have helped him in any way."
"Plus, Professor," Fred continued, "the content of the ‘talk’ is probably different for muggles than for wizards. Harry could be at a great disadvantage."
"Oh, well," answered the stalwart Professor, "yes, yes of course someone should have this conversation with him," she said, obviously uncomfortable with the direction of this discussion.
"Well, Professor," said George, with just as much discomfort, "I don’t feel that it would be best if my brother or I were to have this initial conversation with our dear friend and investor. We were hoping that you, as the head of his house…"
"…the closest that he has known to a mother outside of our own…"
"…would be the best to discuss this with him."
"It would be uncomfortable for Mum to talk about it with him…"
"…not to mention Dad…"
"…as they are the parents of his romantic interest."
"I see what you mean, Misters Weasley," conceded the matronly professor, "but I can’t help but feel that this is not normally within my purview as a Hogwarts Professor."
"Of course it’s outside of your normal duties, Professor."
"But we appreciate the help to one that we consider a brother."
"Certainly," the normally stern Deputy Headmistress said after a moment of consideration, "and I will have ‘the talk’ with him, as I agree with you two that he does need to know certain things with correct information, rather than the often incorrect information I fear is commonly spread amongst the young adults of this school."
"Thank you, Professor."
"…and may we suggest that this would be easier if you were to get a relative expert on the medical side of the matter by securing the assistance of Madame Pomfrey?"
"And if you would, Professor," continued George, "Would you, please, give him this personal letter afterward? It is to assure him that if he has any questions that require, um, discussion with his contemporaries, he would be welcomed to discuss it with one of us rather that rely on the information from his younger friends."
"We believe that this letter is best read after ‘the talk’, as he may be in need of help absorbing the information from a younger perspective."
"Of course, Messer’s Weasley," the Professor said appreciatively, "and this is a good thing that you two have done. You are good friends to Mister Potter and he needs all of those that he can get."
As the terrible Weasley twins finished talking with their old Transfigurations Professor, Harry was in the hospital still, though not unhappily, as his very own fiery redhead was comforting him. Their attentions were diverted by the arrival of a common tawny delivery owl bearing a rolled package.
Harry took the package and gave an appreciating pet to the animal.
"Well open it," said Ginny impatiently.
"Patience."
"Shush…what is it?"
Harry unrolled the package and discarded the protective layer of parchment to reveal…
"A magazine," Harry said. "Funny, I don’t subscribe to any…"
Harry trailed off as he saw the cover of the glossy magazine, ‘Witch Weekly’. It was emblazoned with a picture.
A picture of him, Harry James Potter.
Well, him and his boxers…and not much else.
Harry stared in shocked disbelief.
Ginny stared for a completely different reason.
Ginny shook herself free of her stupor before Harry managed to wrap his mind around the thought that he was gracing the cover of an international magazine with little left to the imagination.
Ginny grabbed the magazine and flipped to the listed pages of the promised pictorial.
"Well, Harry," she started, "that’s not too bad. You look really good so it’s not too embarrassing."
She flipped another page and the center of the magazine folded out, twice.
"A CENTERFOLD!" screamed Harry. "I know that I said that I would wait until Christmas to enact revenge for all of the pranks, but a centerfold!"
Ginny looked at the twice folded paper and growled, "I better not find any of these posted in the girls’ dorms."
"Or anywhere else," grumbled Harry.
"I’m going to go…" she said, getting up and kissing his cheek, "go and do…something."
"George, I do believe that, while we were not looking, we may have matured into adults."
"Fred, I do believe you may be right. That was a good thing we did in there."
"Yes, I agree. But with your maturity, I am afraid your pranks have turned nearly evil."
"Yes, dear brother, as a deed, it was both righteous and necessary, but as a prank, it was at the same time, evil."
"Yes, good but evil. Quite a combination," agreed Fred, "but, what was really in the letter?"
"The letter stated just what we said it did, but at the same time it included a card, from me, taking credit for conceiving of the prank part of ‘the talk’."
"Yes, I understand that it is a prank, but how can you take the credit? It is just ‘the talk’, and you, or we, are not doing the talking."
"Yes, but I take credit for it as a prank, as the only more embarrassing person that I could have chosen to ask at the school would have been our own Sneering Potions Professor, and we could have never pulled this off with him."
"Indeed, but perhaps Harry won’t appreciate the genius of such an evil prank."
"Madame Pomfrey, may I leave now?" an antsy Harry asked.
"Not quite yet, Mister Potter," the school healer said, "but you may get dressed in the robes your head of house has brought."
"Okay," Harry said, "but why can’t I leave if I can dressed?"
"Mr. Potter," came another voice from the other end of the room, "Perhaps I can answer that."
Harry looked up to see his transfiguration professor dragging an easel to his screened off area.
"You see, Mister Potter," started the Professor, "there comes a point in every young witch or wizard’s life when they need to learn certain things, when they realize that there are differences between witches and wizards. We believe that it is time for us to have ‘the talk’."
Harry and Ginny staggered to the portrait hole at the same time, meeting shoulder to shoulder in shock. Amazingly, one of them managed to give the password to the kind, rotund lady.
They shuffled through and over to the couch where they normally sat.
"What happened to you two?"
This caused Harry and Ginny to look at each other for the first time since entering.
"Oh…well…you see," they both started at once.
"You first," Ginny said.
"No," Harry said, "you first. I insist."
He shuddered.
"Oh…Okay…well, Mum sort of…she…gaveme’thetalk’."
"What?" Ron asked.
"I said," said Ginny, quietly but clearly, "Mum gave me ‘the talk’."
"Oh?" Harry said, breaking out of his shell a little. "I got ‘the talk’ too, but from Professor McGonagall and Madame Pomfrey." He shuddered again.
"You got ‘the talk’ from two witches?" Ron goggled. "I got mine from Dad. It was bad enough getting it from someone of the same gender. That’s got to be horrible from someone of the opposite…sex." Ron shuddered.
"Yeah," Harry said. "But imagine how bad it would have been from your dad for me?"
"Why?" asked Ron.
Hermione snickered and then answered, "Because your dad is also Ginny’s dad, and that would be…awkward."
"Oh…O-o-oh," comprehension flashed to Ron’s face. "Yeah, bad."
"So, we know why Ginny got ‘the talk’, why did you?" Hermione asked.
"Really?" asked Harry. "And why did you get ‘the talk’ Miss Weasley?"
Ginny smiled, but tucked her chin down and blushed. She wasn’t answering.
Hermione, however, was amused.
"Well, Harry," Hermione answered for her friend. "During your…display…Saturday morning, Ginny turned to her mum and told her it was time to teach her ‘those’ spells."
Harry blinked for a second. "Ah, those spells. They taught me some of ‘those’ spells as well, but they had flash cards and an easel with diagrams and illustrations…," he shuddered heavily.
"I don’t get it," Ron said. "What is so bad about diagrams and illustrations?"
Harry shuddered again. "Ron…in the wizarding world, diagrams and illustrations…move. And I was being taught by…"
"Oh…yeah that’s bad."
"As to why I got ‘the talk’ now," Harry said, "afterward they gave me this in an envelope."
Harry held out the card proclaiming George to be the prank king (in his own mind) with this prank. Harry didn’t show them the letter because of some…graphic language and…well…adult content. As nice as their offer advice was, it was not PG-13.
Harry blushed thinking about it.
"Ginny?" Harry said in a whispered voice.
She turned to look at him.
"H-harry? I thought that you went to bed?" she said in a shy, quiet voice.
"I just laid down," Harry said. "Too many thoughts, not enough distraction."
"Oh."
"Gin…," Harry said hesitant, "we should talk after…you know."
"Yeah," Ginny agreed. "I guess that this sort of rushed us to this point," she chuckled.
"Yeah," Harry smiled, "I guess it did."
"Did it scare you?" Ginny asked.
"No…Yeah, I guess it did," Harry said. "What she said about when we…and when…and what could happen."
"Harry," Ginny said in a caring manner, "I know it will hurt some, but…"
"But?"
"But it will be worth it…someday," she offered.
"Gin," Harry said softly. "This isn’t necessary. We have a good relationship. We don’t need to take that step yet. I love you and I love ‘us’ the way we are."
"You mean…?"
"I mean that we don’t have to. I don’t feel ready. I…well…you…I don’t know how you feel about it, but we should wait. We have a f-future ahead of us. Let’s not do anything too early."
"Oh…good…you mean that you don’t want…?" she asked shyly.
"Gin, when I look at you I smolder with desire to be with you in every way," Harry assured her. "You are the most beautiful, desirable, sexy woman that I know and I need you more than air, but I think that we should wait."
"Thank you, Harry," she hugged him. "I was worried that you wanted it, you know, with all of your romantic dinners and kissing, I just thought that you…"
"Ginny, I treat you well because I want to treat you well," Harry said firmly. "I have no ulterior motive. I expect only love if you have it and honesty always."
"Harry," Ginny responded, "you’ll always have my love and honesty."
"Thank you."
"About the other…when…?" she asked.
"Maybe we should wait until we are married…unless something changes…" Harry is cut off by his own yawn and the sudden need for sleep.
"Perhaps we should go to bed," Harry said. He leaned down and gave her a light brush of lips together. "I have potions tomorrow. G’night."
Harry turned and left the common room be way of the boy’s staircase.
Ginny stood shocked.
Harry said married.
Harry wanted to be married someday.
Harry wanted to be married someday to her.
Harry wanted to be married someday to her and he wanted to wait for sex until he was.
She smiled.
That was all right for now, but she might just have to change his timetable someday.