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Puck posted a comment on Friday 17th November 2006 4:09am for Chapter 1

Cute

Hope he doesn't get sent back that would suck

MonkeyAxman1302 posted a comment on Thursday 16th November 2006 11:42pm for Chapter 1

Very interesting first chapter! If this is going to be your NaNoWriMo its a good start its nearly 20k words!! lol!

I thought that Ginny was believably 7, an odd thing to say I know but true in my opinion. A slightly older child might have realised that her parents wouldn't react to Harry the same way they did to Ron's stray dog. Especially if they saw him beaten blue. I think that her character was well portrayed.

Liked the Accidental summoning charm on Ginny an an 8 year old doing apparition has to be a first! I wonder if Dumble's wards would have picked that up!

I look forward to more!

Monkey

Nyeshet posted a comment on Thursday 16th November 2006 12:46pm for Chapter 1

Ginny thinks Harry a muggle, and therefore has not yet made the connection between his name and who he *really* is. While she may have suspected the accidental magic in the park to have perhaps come from herself, Harry apparating into her room is likely a different story. When he arrived, however, too many things needed to be done for such thoughts to roam her mind. When she awakens, I imagine she may finally wonder - and finally realize the truth. Far from becoming more fan-girl-ish towards Harry, I suspect she will become even more protective of him - perhaps seeking to hide him in her room and smuggle food upstairs after breakfast, for instance.

As for Dumbledore noticing Harry's departure, it may actually take awhile. The wards are not perfect. What little we know of them suggests that they detect dark magic and the presence of wizards more than other things. Note that no one seems to have visited after Harry accidentally apparated to the top of the school building in the books (which, if I am not mistaken, would have occurred in the next few weeks / months or so during a Harry Hunt). Harry's squib neighbor was placed there on purpose to keep an eye out for things that the wards miss. I imagine that she will report to Dumbledore in a couple days that she has seen no sign of Harry working outside. The Dursleys don't like to stand out, so if she asks them directly about Harry (perhaps asking if he can do a chore for her, or some such) they are not likely to admit that Harry somehow ran away (which is likely how they will see it - along with the idea of 'good riddance to bad rubbish, I imagine). Thus, Dumbledore may not find out for a few days.

Harry, on the other hand, will very very soon realize that magic really exists - if for no other reason than Ginny having to explain about the ghoul due to the sounds it makes. Once he realizes that magic does exist it shouldn't be too hard for him to realise that the accidental magic was due to him - not strange co-incidence.

Similarly, he will likely recall his thoughts / feelings prior to his apparation. If he is returned, I imagine that he may simply attempt it again. I can't see Dumbledore feeling fine about Harry potentially splinching himself - especially without wizards nearby to help should he find himself in that dangerous and potentially life threatening condition (dependent, of course, on what is left behind).

I'm just guessing, but I think that Ginny - seeking a way to keep Harry from having to go back to his family - will seek to find a way to make Harry a part of her family. Wedding vows - especially if they are magically binding - may eventually be an idea she comes up with, perhaps as a last resort, perhaps not. If such vows are not age restricted (and, from the triwizard tournament it seems that some very dangerous magic is *not* typically age restricted, as it needed extra magic (Dumbledore's age line spell) to prevent those beneath a certain age from entering. Most adolescents and adults would know better than to rush into such magically binding situations as wedding vows, while it may be a blind spot that keeps them from realizing that a pair of children may one day stumble upon such and attempt to make them. Or perhaps children are seen as not yet magical enough to form such a bond, but Harry's unusually strong magic allows it?

Either way, I quite look forward to the coming chapters. How long, I wonder, will it take for the Weasleys to discover their houseguest. I would imagine that at best they have 2-5 days before Dumbledore knows and sends a letter to Harry - with a tracking charm so that he knows where it ends up. Actually, as intelligent and as wise as he is, he may be able to scry the location in a mirror, for all I know. Too bad his rosy-hued glasses and lack of common sense skew the results of his wisdom and intellect.

Musings of Apathy replied:

Wow, I'm glad that you liked my first chapter.  I intend to address just what Ginny knew of Harry's identity and his signifigance in the next chapter.  This is also where I go off canon from the fan-girl part of her personna.

After such a long review, I hope that i have some surprises left for you.

Pathfinder985 posted a comment on Thursday 16th November 2006 8:07am for Chapter 1

Great concept. Can't wait to see what Mrs. Weasley does when she finds him. Well written and put together. Keep it up!

Raven posted a comment on Thursday 16th November 2006 7:50am for Chapter 1

I love the story and all, but I just got touches of H/G small ship feelings, but overall not a bad story. And another thing was I don't think Molly would be so welcome a boy lying on her youngest daughter's bed, who is yet only seven. Ah, this is going to be good

Wookie13 posted a comment on Thursday 16th November 2006 7:15am for Chapter 1

Wow! What a unique start to any story that I've ever read!!!! I love how all of this is starting and I hope for more of the same with the chapters to follow. The question that comes to mind is how is Ginny going to hide Harry?

PerfesserN posted a comment on Thursday 16th November 2006 3:46am for Chapter 1

Disturbingly realistic depictions of abuse, physical, mental and probably sexual - abuse is about control, I wonder if Petunia and Dudley will ever recognize that they themselves are victims as well.
"He followed me home, can I keep him?" would be a good title for the next chapter.

Sheepstamper posted a comment on Thursday 16th November 2006 12:33am for Chapter 1

Ohhh! this is very good.... keep going....

IceBlades posted a comment on Wednesday 15th November 2006 10:20pm for Chapter 1

This is already shaping up to be an awesome story. I can't wait to read what comes next

CRose posted a comment on Wednesday 15th November 2006 8:23pm for Chapter 1

Tons of potential here. We get to see the Demon Dursleys at it again. The next chapter should be quite interesting. Though I have a feeling that Dumbledore will show up eventually and force harry back to the Dursleys. It's what he does.

KenF posted a comment on Wednesday 15th November 2006 8:22pm for Chapter 1

That's a long chapter. 7 year old Ginny may be a bit mature, but is just so cute. I hope you decide to run with this one for a bit... oh, and I hope you pay a bit of attention to Cracked Reservoir too.

Mark Stanley posted a comment on Wednesday 15th November 2006 8:15pm for Chapter 1

Good story so far. I like how you have Harry and Ginny meet, and how Ginny figures out a way to keep in contact with Harry. Excellent handling of all the characters so far. Looking forward to seeing more.

noylj posted a comment on Wednesday 15th November 2006 4:05pm for Chapter 1

There will be more, won't there? Soon?
One thing you can count with wizarding world adults, and the Weasleys in particular, is to say the wrong things and make assumptions that are almost universally wrong.
Now, if Ginny can just keep Harry away from any adults...

seeker77 posted a comment on Wednesday 15th November 2006 12:56pm for Chapter 1

very nice (long)chapter. I have been hooked on "Cracked" since I found it so I check your site daily for updates and found this one. I like it. Keep up the work this has a nice little what if to it that should play out to a nice story.

Michael Foerster posted a comment on Wednesday 15th November 2006 12:56pm for Chapter 1

Wow, that's really tightly written. It's so good, it makes you want more of it. (Esp. the next morning, when Molly tries to wake her ;-) ).
Thanks.

graup posted a comment on Wednesday 15th November 2006 11:15am for Chapter 1

Interesting start to the story. Good work, and I look forward to updates.

Thanks for sharing it.

The Midnight Poster posted a comment on Wednesday 15th November 2006 10:55am for Chapter 1

Oh good, I was worried you were going to leav us with a clify. Looking forward on how Harry stays with Ginny.

John Davis posted a comment on Wednesday 15th November 2006 10:32am for Chapter 1

This story is interesting. I hope to see more of it as soon as possible.

riegert8 posted a comment on Wednesday 15th November 2006 10:31am for Chapter 1

I like this chapter. It is funny how ginny got woke up, too bad that Ron is in trouble for sneaking in a dog. It nice that Ginny got a chance to go London and be there when Bill pick out a new suit. I like that Harry meet Ginny, it great that they spend time together. I was surprise that Harry would tell Ginny his home and how shock she is over that, It great that Ginny ask to be his friend. It nice that Ginny kiss Harry before he went home. I have to admit I wonder why Harry would be london in the first place, it make sence that he would have go shopping with hisso called family. It is great that Ginny ask for some Information over the things that her and Harry talk about. I do agree that it hard to see that anyone would abusied a child unless you see it first Hand. I was surprise that Ginny did not tell mother his full name when her mother asked, the reason is that she know that her parent have heard of Harry. It funny that Ginny is already talking about a meeting a special boy with her father, and that her and Harry would fight Evil wizard and Dragons and live Happy ever after. It would come as a big shock since she is seven year old and he would this won't happen as long as possible. I not am sure what I think about that Arthur and Molly tell their daughter that if he needs help that a member of the family or teacher or someone would help him, to me it sound like they are saying it not our business and we won't do anything and hope someone else will. It sad that Vernon would take his bad out on Harry.I like that Ginny keep on ask her parents to save Harry.It great that Harry could escape his aunt house, it great that he runs into Ginny again. It nice that Harry find someone that really care for him that she would worry, It nice that Harry got upset over the treatment of a new girl at his school. The best part of the chapter when she ask Harry to lived with her and her family,what shock me is that Harry would called the Dursley's family. Let look at it Harry been abusedby the Dursley for seven years, the life that Harry lives would make him grow up faster for the simple fact that he would anything he can not to tick off the Dursleys. I t nice that they start writing to each other, it nice thatshe would tell Harry about her family. It sad that Ginny see first hand what the Dudley and his gang is liked, it nice that Harry want to protect her. I like that they tell each other that they love each other, I am surprise at the age of the two people. It sad that Harry get a really bad beating, it great that Harry some how made where Ginny is at. Would the Weasley's have apparition wards in their house, that a alarm would go off if someone apparitied in their home, you just don't wany just anyone in your home. It nice that Ginny is going hide Harry and Nurse him back to health. In my humble optiont this is a great chapter. I am sorry if this is two long of review. I know this is my second review of the same chapter. I just did not like the first one and I thought I could have done better.

Musings of Apathy replied:

Nothing wrong with a long review.  It warms an author's heart.

Thank you.

Terry Swain posted a comment on Wednesday 15th November 2006 9:36am for Chapter 1

Great start. looking forward to more. :)